WRECKERS FOR HIRE No Building too small! No furniture too large! We’re Ready To Destroy You(r stuff)! Scribe:obs1C-WRECKIT!
SureFire Cooking Lessons Tired of not knowing one end of a rolling pin from the other? Can’t boil water? Scribe:obs1C-COOKNOW for your first lesson today!
WONKYSTUFF EGGWHISK POKER WANTED. Must have working coolant handle & come with original switchoutable whisks. Scribe:obs1C-WHISK.
Nutlet for a MKIV Speedreader. Will exchange nutlet for mean-mouthed wife. Scribe:obs1C-MKIV
Magic Hamster Fob Watch for Sale. Never used. Prime condition. Comes with 5 Magic Scroll Wheels and spinner. Scribe:obs1C-HAMFOB with offer. No time wasters.
Domestic dirigible for scrap. Best offer. No haggling. I have a gun! Scribe:obs1C-SCRAP
BOT SQUIFFER WANTED Experienced bot squiffer wanted for the dirigible ‘Blank Shot’. Sleep where you can and eat the slops what’s given you. No leave. Rubbish pay, and only if you’re lucky. Keep your nose clean or you’re looking at these ads again! Scribe:obs1C-SQUIFF!
FREELANCE NINJA NEEDED URGENTLY Can’t tell you anything because it’s Top Secret. If I told you, I’d have to kill you and that would defeat the purpose of hiring you since I would have to send you out to kill yourself and somehow I doubt you would carry out the mission! Which makes you completely useless to me at this point so don’t bother applying. He who takes me by surprise gets the job. Scribe:obs1C-NINJA
SNAUSAGE STUFFER NEEDED. Must have experience. HSTGE1 & 2 certification required. Scribe:obs1C-STUFFER
Elderly but spritely badger with kind heart seeks wild fox for endless bushy tail chasing and marshmallow toasting. Scribe:obs1C-BUSHY
Lonely Tor Mord looking for Mord Rider! No previous mord buddy. Mordites welcome. Must like blue trees. Scribe:obs1C-TORMORD
River otter with ambitions to be a superhero seeks gentle, meek lady for frequent rescuing. All daring deeds are covered by personal insurance.
BANDIT LEADER SEEKS MAID. Must have woodland survival, archery and one-pot-cooking skills. GSO direction a bonus. Scribe:obs1C-WOODMAID. No Imperial Hunters please.